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Jess Antonette Breaks Her Silence with Powerful New Single ‘Real for Me’ – Exclusive Interview

Nashville country singer-songwriter Jess Antonette releases a painfully real first single of 2025—and we’ve got the scoop! Read our exclusive interview.

We sat down with country singer-songwriter Jess Antonette to discuss her new single, "Real for Me," which addresses difficult topics like mental, physical, and emotional abuse, along with the manipulation and invalidation often used by abusers to protect their image. After years of keeping her story private, Jess is now ready to share her truth. Co-written with Gabe Walsh and Cay Aliese, "Real for Me" sheds light on the pain many endure in silence, giving a voice to those who feel unheard.

 
Q: Humor and lightheartedness are a big part of who you are, especially on social media. How do you balance the lighter side of yourself with this more serious, emotionally charged music?

A: “I don’t think of it as balancing the 'light and dark.' It’s not about balance—we’re all complex, multidimensional beings. We carry a range of emotions, and every day feels different. That’s just the reality of being human. Some days, I genuinely feel silly and goofy, but that doesn’t mean I don’t also have my struggles. Both parts of me are equally true.

What’s probably been most surprising for people is that, because I’ve kept certain parts of my life private, it’s easy for others to assume I’m only one way. But the truth is, you never really know what someone’s been through. This side of me may be new to the public, but for me, it’s not. I’ve always been an innately happy and silly person at my core. So, what you see on social media or in person is just as real as the experiences this song reflects.”

 
Q: In your press release, you mentioned how sweeping things under the rug in your family caused a lot of pain. Has music helped you heal?

A: “I’m really glad you asked this, because it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot. Music has been a form of therapy for me—writing, in general, has helped a ton. When I was a kid, I was always writing songs, but I never, not in a million years, thought I’d end up being a singer. Back then, I was too scared to show how I was really feeling because, honestly, no one cared to listen. So, I kept those poems and lyrics locked away in journals that are still sitting at my mom’s house. Yet, here I am, making it my career.

When I strip away the psychology of it all, I think it boils down to this: for most of my life, I’ve felt unseen and unheard. I was only seen for my reactions. I’ve had to scream for justice (some) that never came. So, is it really any wonder that I’ve built a career around making sure my voice is heard? Music, for me, is a release. It’s like an alternate world where we can feel in control. The process of releasing this song has already changed me. Music is a gift."

 

Q: Releasing something so deeply personal can be daunting. What advice would you give to others who are considering sharing their own painful or vulnerable stories through art or music?

A: “The advice I’d give to someone is to first make sure you’re truly ready to expose that part of yourself—and ready for people to form their own opinions about it. The reality is, you might not get the reaction you hoped for. The people the song is about might get upset. And that’s okay.

What’s important is finding peace no matter how it’s received. Stay true to your story, and try not to get defensive if things don’t go as planned. Once you put yourself out there, it’s out there forever—so make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons.”

 

Q: You’ve been very open about the generational trauma in your family. How have you worked through this, and how does it influence your relationships today?

A: “Generational trauma doesn’t end until real change happens—nothing changes unless something changes. I have to stop the patterns that even i've adopted. From a very young age, I knew I wasn’t going to let people pretend like things didn’t happen. I’ve spent my life confronting toxic relationships and behaviors, learning how to unlearn and re-wire my own thinking.

To be honest, I don’t think I was truly ready to face it all until my late 20s. With some people, it’s been a never-ending cycle—making progress only to fall back. With others, I had to completely cut them out because they refuse to do the work. I’ve made peace with that. I'm in a great place. I will never allow anyone to gaslight me, or belittle my feelings etc.

Healing is a beautiful thing, especially when you’re able to move forward with the people who once hurt you. But I also believe some people are just not good people. Relationships—especially with friends and family—are complicated. Sometimes, the ones who should love you the most end up hurting you the worst.

The most important thing I’ve done for myself is learn my own boundaries. I’ve started to understand my emotions, my reactions, and make intentional choices about who and what I allow into my life—especially when it comes to romantic relationships. I’d rather be alone and happy than stay with someone who could recreate these curses for my future kids. If I’m creating the life I want, I get to decide what belongs in it. I mess up every day. I’m not perfect, but I’m trying my best."
 

Q: You’ve mentioned that staying silent helped others preserve their self-image. How does it feel now, finally releasing this song, and what does it mean for your sense of self and your future work?

A: “Honestly, it feels really good. It feels freeing. My whole life, I’ve spent so much energy protecting people who have hurt me—whether directly or indirectly. And even though I’ve mended some of those relationships and some of those people have worked on themselves, it doesn’t erase my truth. It doesn’t change what was real.

Before the song came out, I spoke with a few people and said, 'I have a song coming out that might be uncomfortable to hear. This is my truth, and it’s why I create music. You don’t have to listen to it, but I wanted to be honest with you.'

I won’t lie—I held my breath when the song came out, worried about what people would think. But then I reminded myself…what matters is what I think. And that realization? That’s freedom.

I think this freedom is breaking chains for me, and it’s only going to allow me to put more of myself into my music.”

 
Q: After releasing such a personal song, where do you go from here musically? Do you plan to continue addressing these themes, or are there other directions you’d like to explore with your upcoming work?

A: “This song has allowed me to open up in ways I never have before. 'Real For Me' isn’t just another music release—it’s been a therapeutic release. From pre-press to post, I’ve been digging deep and confronting topics that have held me back musically, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. With every interview, I’m peeling back layers. Certain parts of me have been so guarded, and realizing that a song like this can strip you down completely—forcing you to be vulnerable and honest, even when it’s uncomfortable—has been incredibly freeing.

I don’t know if I’ll continue singing about these topics, but I’m sure as hell not afraid to anymore. I’ve definitely found parts of myself and opened up more emotionally. I’ve always struggled with vulnerability in relationships, so this process has really helped me grow. The other day, I was writing and realized I’m way more in tune with my emotions than before. I think we’re about to see the most real parts of who I am. And from here? We only go up.”

 

Learn more about Jess Antonette and her new single, "Real For Me," out now!
 
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